For starters, The Bible tells us that God created light on the first day (in his famous "Let there be light" moment). On the second and third days He dabbled in some other things rolling around in His head, and then on the fourth day He finally created the sun, stars, and moon. It's often held by scientists -- as well as the public in general -- that the sun and stars provide Earth's natural light. Not so, says The Bible; light just is, and the sun and stars are more decorative in nature. They're lights, sure, but they aren't the lights.
Also interesting is the fact that The Bible says God made the moon a "lesser light," even though the moon does not actually emit light but only reflects light from the sun. To call the moon a light is like calling a mirror a light. So, the obvious conclusion is that we've been wrong about mirrors.
The Bible then goes on to point out that we completely misunderstand the nature of stars. To the people living in Biblical times -- intellectuals compared to us -- stars were simply lights in the sky. Good ol' omniscient God also was of this opinion, as this was written in the God-inspired Bible: "And there fell a great star from heaven, burning as it were a lamp, and it fell upon the third part of the rivers, and upon the fountains of waters"(Revelation 8:10). Oops. Guess our modern astronomers kinda suck. Stars are close enough and tiny enough that they can fall from the sky onto Earth and into rivers.
But our Biblical astronomy lessons don't end there. Next up is the fact that the sky is actually a gigantic roof that separates us from the water above (what Earth actually looks like pictured at left). And when it rains, that's just holes opening up in the sky-roof (the firmament) allowing the water above us to leak out. Just further proof that our "trips" to the moon were an insidious hoax.
Now lets move on to the fact that the solar system -- nay, the entire universe -- is geocentric (revolves around the Earth) rather than heliocentric (revolves around the sun). According to the infallible Bible, "The world is firmly established; it cannot be moved." (Psalms 93:1) All of the evidence we have to the contrary is, of course, the work of Satan.
Satan also, quite obviously, planted all of the evidence we have pointing to the Earth being spherical, as The Bible very clearly states in more than a few places that the Earth is flat. Here's one of those instances: "he will assemble the scattered people of Judah from the four quarters of the earth." (Isaiah 11:12)
- Deaf mutes? Possessed by the devil. (Matthew 9:32 and Matthew 12:22)
- Epilepsy? Super demon-caused. (Matthew 17:14-18)
- Insanity? Evil spirits. Obv. (Mark 5:1-13)
God also lets us know -- via the inspired word of The Bible -- that hares eat regurgitated food (they don't), and snakes eat dirt (nope, try again), and bats are birds (is God a three-year-old?).
Anyway, I could go on endlessly, but you get the point: Science classes should use The Bible as a textbook. That's the point I was getting at, anyway. Is that what came across?
-- The Atheist Apologist --